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Nov 04, 2023

17 Stupid Things We Did As Kids

"I was about halfway through the tunnel when I heard the sound of the train horn

"I was about halfway through the tunnel when I heard the sound of the train horn blasting".

BuzzFeed Staff

"They situated the trampoline between the house and the pool taking turns jumping off the roof and bouncing into the pool.

The first three made it, but the fourth ended up one wish-boning himself on the trampoline's frame; blowing out a nut and cracking his pelvis. Luckily, there was video evidence of the fact that I was in no way involved."

—lolamommy621

"I was in the front seat so I decided it would be fun to recline my seat to crush him. I did this for a good five minutes before he managed to get his feet up behind the seat and push as hard as he could.

I didn't have a seatbelt on, so it launched me into the windshield and spiderwebbed the glass. Our mom had been two weeks without a cigarette at this point... We kinda ruined her streak. At least she managed to quit eventually!"

—ccurtis50

"Two of us would get on a riding mower, each with another kid sitting on the hood wearing the helmet, and we'd play chicken. After one girl broke her arm and bloodied her nose, all the others said it was my idea (because it happened behind my house). I didn't have any friends for two years."

—lolamommy621

"Each chair gave us our own separate compartment, with the heaviest person at the bottom and the lightest crawling up a ladder to the top. It worked for about 12 minutes, and then we came crashing down and knocked the wind out of my sister in the middle. I thought she had died!"

—lolamommy621

"So, six-year-old me thought all liquids are drinkable, and proceeded to try to drink a bottle of very expensive perfume. It was not a pleasant experience, and once my mum was assured that I was safe, she then got angry about the perfume."

—silverwing33

"She covered her hand in it and stuck it to her forehead before he noticed. He then tried to unstick it, but there was enough residue left on her hand that he ALSO got his hand stuck to her hand/head.

"My mum is a nurse and the glue was cheap, so luckily she was able to safely unstick them without injury – all I remember is her laughing non-stop during the whole process."

—sarahed1990

"I was chilling in the church pre-k and I put my head through the bars on the back of the seat with no problem, but I couldn't get back out. The teacher alerted my parents and called the church maintenance guy. He ended up having to saw one of the bars off and I was so embarrassed!"

—sarahschindler89

"I was actually okay, but a little stunned so I laid down there for a while. Well, I WAS okay until my even bigger idiot of a brother proceeded to follow what I did, even though he'd seen that it didn't work. I landed on my ankle, which resulted in a sprain."

—thatauntieyoulike

"It was a great game when we were teens to run from one end of the tunnel to the other (about 400 yards) and hope that a train didn't come through while you were in there. Well, one time when I was about halfway through the tunnel when I heard the sound of the train horn blasting and I knew I was in deep shit.

I was scared to death when I saw the train light coming into the tunnel, but I managed to press myself up against the side of the tunnel as best I could while the train passed through.

I don't know if the engineer saw me, but I swear he must have because he blasted the horn really loud, which magnified my fear! I lived to tell the tale and never did that again!"

—sidneykaler

"The result was goddamn mustard gas, I'm convinced. Luckily we had the house aired out before his parents got home."

—thesettledpirate

—billiebaskettgriffin

"One day, my brother went to my mom and complained that his ear was hurting, so she asked if he had put anything in it. He said 'no'.

Several hours later, he went to my mom and said, 'I have to tell you something.' Sure enough, he had shoved one of those teeny tiny beads so far into his ear that he had to go to the ER and get it removed by a doctor.

It must run in the family though because as a kid, my mom once stuffed some M&Ms super far up her nose. My grandfather decided to turn on their oven and put her head inside to melt the chocolate because they wouldn't budge when she blew her nose."

—maysmordred

"I naturally thought the funniest thing to do would be to insert the flare between my cheeks (yes, those cheeks), and light it. That's the day I learned how hot flares burn. Thankfully, some kindhearted friends hosed down my anus in the bath for a few hours and I left with my arse intact, but my dignity in tatters."

–casualgem30

"I had to drag myself upstairs to alert them to the fact that I had a three-inch gash in my foot, and I was trailing blood the whole way up the stairs from the living room. I still have a big scar over my heel and nerve sensitivity to this day."

—danielleyoung1

"My sister and cousins decided to try running at each other to see what would happen. My sister had braces at this point... My cousin ended up with a nice scar on her eyebrow."

—mollystroup

"I was watching TV in the living room and there was some show with firemen in it and they were putting out a fire. I was super impressed, and I wanted to be a fireman, but what could I do to make it happen?

There was no fire nearby, so I went to the kitchen and politely asked my grandma for a glass of water. Then I walked very calmly to her bedroom, turned one of the bedside lamps on and promptly poured the whole glass of water onto it.

The light bulb exploded and I got cut by a flying bit of glass hitting my neck. I was afraid of light bulbs for at least a year after that!"

—flying_finny

"We'd turn off all the lights and in pitch darkness we'd have a bit of a wrestle. My friend was swinging his arm back, and I couldn't see that I'd moved closer to him, so his elbow caught me straight in the nose at full force.

We heard a splatter, someone found the light switch, and when it came on the white walls were sprayed with blood. After one broken nose and some very annoyed parents, we retired the game."

–bendzialdowski

Editor's note: some submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.